Hour 7 : 5:30
Yes, she was no one for me, just a stranger on this strange night, which was fading fast now. There were smooth blue in sky now instead of the darker one. Finally the night was falling off my shoulders. Her story was one tragic ones, which reminded of a song from band called Puddle of Mudd, she fucking hates me. I loved that song completely, however never got to sing that song, cause there was never a ‘she’ in my life, fortunately. Anyway, who wants a ‘she’ and what if ‘she’ turns out like ‘her’? I was self amused by this thought, but then again charged myself guilty of laughing at her situation. I turned back and asked her finally.
“Why did you got into a relation when you knew he didn’t have guts to stand besides you?”
“Yes, go ahead blame me. It’s entire my fault. Tell me how do you know about a person’s trait and personality, risk taking capability.”
“But you said, you were in relation for two years. That’s a long time to get to know a guy, right?”, “and I’m not at all blaming you, here you have been a victim of circumstances. And certainly because of people.”
“I think you are right, it was my fault, and I was so blinded by his promises and fake love that I couldn’t see his real. I was always in a dream world.”
She continued, like she was delivering a speech.
“He always laughed at me, went out with me, and even was not afraid like other men who are afraid of being looked with a girl in crowd. We met more than two times a week taking time for each other from our busy schedules. Called each other before sleeping, cared so much for each other. If one was down with fever the other would run for medicines and be there even before needed.”
“And your parents knew?”
“No, they were doubtful till yesterday.”
All of sudden she started to collect herself. As if she was feeling guilty of sharing personal thoughts with me. It used to happen with me few years ago, when I was conscious of ‘what-might-people-think-about-me’ and ‘‘I’m-a-closed-book, no-one-shall-ever-reach-me.’ , this stopped when I sat one day one a night like this, with a cup of coffee and of course cigarettes. Today was different. I tried to console her saying
“Don’t worry I won’t judge you, I can’t simply judge you. If you want to continue, please do.”
It was her turn to get surprised. After all I read her thoughts twice this night.
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